chaseing rainbows
by bloodhoney
Summary: with charlie dead, and edward back, can the cullens help rid bella of the constant nightmare of watching her father die, and why wont alice come home, all that bella wants is saveing... b/e read and review lots plz :


epov

change nobody liked it but it always seemed inevitable, life was forvever changeing as were people, and there was nothing that could be done to stop it.  
i knew this yet i still feel so helpless as i watch my sweet sweet bella lye there night after night tossing and turning forvever haunted by those same nightmares that she tryed so hard to forget, her dreams turned to nightmares, and for what, for the simple reason of what i am for the simple truth that i left to protect her from what we are when in truth i should have been protecting her from herself.  
the moment that she laid her deep brown eyes on me, when her overactive brain worked in overdrive and she figured out what we were, she became attached, she clung to us with a vice like grip that with my words was crushed, how could she belive me so easily, after the many times i had told her that i loved her.  
i ran away from her trying to protect her, from myself, from the souless creatures that we are, and that bella so wished to become, when in truth i should have stayed to protect her from herself A slight breath escaped her mouth, she hadn't really talked in her sleep for a while, all she ever said now was the slight mutterings of mine or alice's names, my oh so distent favorste sister,  
bella's best friend, who refused to come home to some reason unknown to me.  
she thought i was a dream she would forever squeez her eye's shut hopeing that when she was to open them she would return to reality, how had i hurt her so cut so deepinto her chest and screwed up her heart, makeing her feeling's for us unsure and snatching all the hope that her pure heart once held.  
I watched as bella's chest would raise and fall rapidly as if she were running, as she tossed her head back and forth as if trying to shake the bad memories from her head, a pained look swept across her face as she whispered alice's name once more.  
Her face twisted up as sshe let out an ear spliting scream, she shoot out of bed looking around my room that we know sheared, when she laid her eye's on me sat next to her she let out the breath she had been holding into a sigh, she cluthched herself tightly to me and closed her eye's,  
"its alright love i'm here" i whispered into her ear.  
"can't you make me forget, i just want to forget please edward" i so hated to denie her anything but this was just something that i could not give i didn't have the power to do something like that to make her forget, that women, as her firey red hair fanned out across her fathers body or her lipes that were curled over her teeth as she held her sharp teeth to his thorote, bella was rooted on sopt forced to watch as her farther's life was drained out of him, the thing that now haunted her nightmares.  
maybe there was something i could do or rather something that could be done, maybe carlilse could help.  
"bella i'll be right back im going to have a word with calisle, esme would you mind" i kissed bella on her forhead, and walked out the room leaving her alone with my loving mother, i walked down the stairs to the floor below that held carlisle's study, i walked upto the door and knocked.  
"come in my son" answered his strong flowing voice.  
i walked in closeing the door behind me, he lifted up his head as i approched his book clutered desk.  
"ahh edward, what may i help you with"  
" i was wondering if you had come across another vampire who could erase surtaine memories" he knew where i was going with this imediatly.  
" are you sure my boy, these things can be quite tramatizeing on the human mind" he said worry clear in his features.  
"what else do you supose i do carlisle, she's begging me, i cant let her live with the constant reminders anymore, it's just to painfull, she's getting no sleep" i begged i saw no other solution, other than change her and that wouldnt erase the memories of her farthers death.  
"yes i do agree with you that it would be the best, im just worried, with her mind already under disstress, what this is going to do to her, alright edward, ask her, and it maybe worth seeing if she still wants to be one of us, then we could make her forget with out any damage"  
i pondered what he had said, maybe it was worth it, but i had promissed her one thing before i change her. 


End file.
